Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all.

If you do not understand what hurt you

caused, brought, incited, and fired,

then you should stay silent. Say nothing.

An ill-placed, ill-timed apology is ill-fated,

and can spark more fire than needs to be

extinguished.

The story behind what led to events that caused

a hurt that cannot be easily erased should be

fully and wholly understood by all parties.

It takes more than a sorry to heal hurt

and it’s true what they say,

hurtful words can cut deeper than sharp knives,

and the scabs never fully disappear,

with blood pooling beneath the surface,

covering a hurt that cannot be bandaged lightly

by an apology.

Apologies are accepted

but only if the person offering it

fully understands the extent of their role

in causing the original pain.

I don’t mean I need to see one suffer,

grovel, beg or plead for forgiveness.

I mean, I need to know that one understands

what caused the hurt,

who the victim was,

how and why the hurt exists,

and then the apology that will follow

may possibly alter the hurt and convert

that into forgiveness.

Don’t feed a hurt empty apologies

because all it does is insult,

insult the original victim

and make petty the causing incident.

Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all.

Nothing.