Invisible

by

He put out his hand to stop her. All he grabbed was air. She had whipped by, leaving in her wake, the strong scent of vanilla and that closet smell that was particular to her. He had once spent an entire afternoon inside that closet, rather than going to the university to work on his thesis. She had found him there when she pulled aside her dresses to reach for her least worn blouse that warmed the back of the closet. Her face had folded into an ‘o’ of utter surprise but she had remained silent, gesturing only for him to exit the closet. They had never spoken of that incident and, now, when he had gathered all his courage to say a word to her, she had swept right by him. He was invisible to her, he felt. The pain of that acknowledgement cut into his forehead, releasing a tremendous headache that was helped along by the tears pooling in his eyes. Strangers looking on may have surmised that he was drunk as he weaved from side to side, annoyed at himself for failing to stop her, upset with her for leaving that beautiful smell in the air around his head. Clouds of vanilla seemed to congregate around his head, chiming at him, mocking words that he could not decipher. He knew that they were mocking words because now everybody was staring at him, and the words seemed to be written on all their faces. Mocking. He failed to realize the sight he presented. Tears streamed down his face, his eyes as red as a blood spurt, his mouth twisted in silent agony and his body starting to fold over into itself. He pulled at his hair, the woolly mass that he had failed to comb for the last 87 days since he had met her. He folded onto the ground, missing his chair by millimeters. All he knew was that she was gone and he had failed to stop her. His failure was like a tattoo branded onto his forehead. Someone peered over him and asked if he was okay. His voice failed to appear, and he closed his eyes so that he could stare into the redness of his lids and wish away the concerned voice that was repeatedly asking if he needed a doctor. As he lay there on Continue reading →

Something

by

There’s something here.

I am not sure what it is,

but it feels really good and right.

This something has me happy,

has me smiling most of the time,

and it has to do with you.

There’s something here.

I see it in your glance

and I feel it in your touch.

What we do about it, I do not know.

Yes.

There’s something here.

Break Juice

by

I saw your heart break

the minute the sentences

left my mouth, and I broke too.

Your face held the most

painful of looks,

when my tongue spilled Continue reading →

Surprised

by

It’s funny the things that keep you on your toes…

a slight but hidden caress, a tender look at an unexpected moment,

or that text that floats in and causes your heart to tremble strangely but happily.

They say you never know when it will happen, and perhaps that surprise is what

keeps your blood pumping and your spirits from sagging when all seems gray,

and perhaps expecting that surprise is what keeps you looking over your shoulder,

into your heart and forever peeking hopefully around the corner, hoping, praying that this Continue reading →

Buna Busus and Breaks

by

Don’t break me this time,

perhaps a fair warning can do.

I can set up a net to catch myself

when you drop me from your skies,

from beneath your darkened angel wings.

Don’t scar me so heavily this time,

I plead.

Perhaps you can let me go unscathed

and unjaded this time around…

place not buna busus on my forehead

then quickly snap my tether

only to let me free fall so unceremoniously

into a net of nothing and despair.

Fear, pain and tears await the fall,

but, I plead,

Do not break me so badly this time around.

Hesitant

by

Not sure where we stand,

things seem much more positive

than they did a day or so ago,

but still, I am hesitant…

my heart is in my mouth

and I am so very afraid

to let go and let you in

because you seem like the type

that I have been warned about before;

the love-’em-and-make-’em-weep type.

Still, I am not sure…

your proclamation may be real and true,

my fears unfounded…

so I take a leap of faith and decide to believe

To believe in you, and the us that you see.

Situations and circumstances may not be

in our favor at the moment,

and time and location are not necessarily on

our side, for our bond and for this stand of ours…

But I want to burn away my hesitation,

and reach for you just like you are reaching for me.

I hope you do not let me fall.